Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
