Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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