): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
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