He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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