If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
