he puts the penis in happiness.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
