Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I yelled at your uterus for you.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
