member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
