Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
