Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize