its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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