check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
