and she was petting her beer can
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
