help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
