you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
