i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
