After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
