I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
