East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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