Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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