watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize