we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
