A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
