i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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