After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
