2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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