he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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