her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
