ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
