I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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