Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize