I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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