Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I believe in your delicious
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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