Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
