I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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