my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
