How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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