theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
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