I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize