the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Randomize
