Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
