I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
