Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You dont lie about slip and slides
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize