How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
