I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Randomize
