If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
