i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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