is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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