thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
