You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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